Goodness Of Fit In Business
by Christine N. Cibula, M.S.

This week I've learned a lot about what goes into adding a horse to the family. It has a lot to do with a concept called "Goodness of Fit" which is a term in statistics that describes how well the actual observations match the expected outcomes.

"Goodness of Fit" applies beautifully as a metaphor in business and in life. So I'll take the opportunity to share my little business lessons learned from Midnight Diamond "Tia" this week. She's trained in Driving (as seen below), Western, and English (as seen above)...

1. Opportunity comes in all shapes and sizes, sometimes rather unexpectedly. One thing is certain, "...That which we think about and dream about we bring about." Yes, I've watched The Secret many times. I've always been a big believer in the process of thinking, dreaming, and manifesting mainly because most everything I've ever truly deeply wanted and believed in has come to life. I've lived into my dreams. The funny thing is that specific desires produce specific opportunities, whereas open-ended desires produce open-ended opportunities.

We put out the intention we're looking for another horse to add to the crew for pleasure riding. My deep (hidden unspoken desire) is that I want to find a beautiful horse with potential for showing if we decide to stay on here in Oklahoma longer-term. What are my most wanted characteristics? Solid and stable feeling underneath me... Responsive without being temperamental... Gentle disposition...

I did not specify size, but I did (secretly) want a bigger horse, a black horse, and a beautiful horse with striking markings that I could work up to competitive dressage levels if I get to be that good. Enter Midnight Diamond "Tia" (which means Princess) - Our Gentle Giant!

2. Sometimes when presented with a bigger opportunity than we think we are ready for, we tend to become a bit overwhelmed, start talking ourselves out of it, and retreat. Since bringing her home some of the things that I've heard are... She could CRUSH a foot! She is A BIG INVESTMENT! Those aren't my words, but they are true observations... :( SHE IS HUGE! We're all agreeing on that one and some things are simply fact. ;-) My words are GENTLE GIANT, GREAT DISPOSITION, AFFECTIONATE, BEAUTIFUL, SWEET, LOVEY, and THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT THAT FACE AND THOSE EYES... :)

3. Goodness of Fit is ESSENTIAL. There is no doubt that Tia is an amazing horse and deserves a phenomenal home. But does she fit? Does she fit with the other horses? Does she make sense as the "family horse" since she is so huge? If I'm the only one "big enough" to comfortably get on her and ride, does she make sense given the riders that come out to the farm to enjoy riding excursions?

4. Some parts of me are ready and other parts of me are not. I remember feeling that way when I worked with the dolphins. A combination of "so excited you can barely breathe" and at the same time "scared to death"! Both sides of the same coin. Sort of like love. Sort of like anything worth doing... :)

5. It takes a leap of faith to say YES to what we really want... I'm admitting to you here and now something I haven't even admitted to my family, which is that I fell in love with her already despite the fact that she's huge, despite the fact that she could crush my foot, despite the fact that I'm not sure how to proceed. Love isn't practical and the heart really doesn't know all the rules of the head. We're on trial with her for a month, so this isn't a done deal at this point and we're only on day two. But here on day two, all I keep thinking is, I am going to do whatever it takes to make this work on my end...

6. Sometimes what we want isn't practical and "THE TIMING" may not rationally "FIT" our lives, but we still deeply want it. Truth is buying a horse does not make sense in our lives right now. We're in Oklahoma temporarily with business and family in California and in route to Hawaii. I basically have designed a business I can do from anywhere with relative ease. We love that FREEDOM... A horse is a commitment and with as busy as the business is and the overall goals in our lives right now, this does not make sense at all. And yet, something about it feels SO right.

7. A short-term fit may not be a long-term fit. Short-term I know there is the potential for a great fit, but does it fit our lives long-term? Tia is five years old. She's already getting attached to us and we're already getting attached to her. If we start sound with her in riding and training, but end up shortchanging her to being a pasture horse, none of us will sleep well at night. And Hawaii is a long way from Oklahoma. So the commitment must work short-term and long-term. This is a huge lesson in business, because sometimes what we want short-term is not the thing that will really help catapult our businesses long-term.

At the same time, sometimes we're looking for a qualitative shift in our lives. For me it is giving myself permission to enjoy my amazing family life AND my inspirational business life AND restorative time in my life NOW. There is something to living life from a standpoint of, "What's Important Now?" a concept I learned from Lou Holtz when he coached Notre Dame football. The truth is that in my life, what is important now is the restorative feeling I get when Tia nuzzles me, looks at me inquisitively, and lets me rub her forehead...

8. We get into things thinking we can handle all of it, and then turn around and realize that while we can handle it all in our heads, in real life it plays out completely different. I think I had one or two weeks where I made it out to ride Gracie (another sweet riding horse at the farm) three times a week because work has been really hectic. But I soon realized once or twice a week was comfortable. I'm not really sure I can make a bigger time commitment than once a week or twice a week realistically with our lives as they are right now.

Yet, we make time for the things we truly value and we find a way to make it work when it is the right thing. So the key is to choose wisely, otherwise life sort of naturally chooses for us. In choosing to spend time with Tia, I'm also choosing to spend time just being in the moment.

9. As entrepreneurs sometimes we get in over our heads and it feels a little too big. It takes time to grow into that which is new. What once seemed too big for us, stepping out of our comfort zone into something bigger than we ever imagined for ourselves, suddenly morphs and becomes doable. Tia is literally way over my head. My head is at her shoulder. I stand on tippy toes and if she doesn't lower her head, I can't get a bridle on her. I need a taller step stool to reach her stirrup comfortably. Everything about her feels bigger than what I believe I can handle... Yet here I am grooming her... Walking with her... Talking with her... Riding her... Lunging her... Feeding her goodies in the field and calling out to her from a distance - and she looks up and listens...

At first, I was a bit scared to get on her, ride her, be alone with her, etc. I know she would never hurt me intentionally, but her size makes me take a deep breath at times (sometimes lots of them). Thing is, so does my business. So what I quickly understood is that if I give myself enough time to let the butterflies in my belly subside enough to allow myself to reach out to her in faith, she comes back in to fill the space on this amazing journey together. It is the exact same way in business, one step at a time, and most of the steps that are worthwhile to me are way out of my comfort zone.

10. There is a feeling I intuitively longed for when we made the decision to come back to Oklahoma for awhile. It was something of comfort, peace, and groundedness. I believe that on some deep fundamental level I needed something of the earth that was the draw to come here for the time being... The feeling that I had back in California when I imagined being back here in Oklahoma is the feeling inside when Tia drops her head and closes her eyes as I rub her forehead and she rests against my chest and tummy or nuzzles me gently for an apple treat.

Trust is a two-way street. She needs to trust me as much as I need to trust her. She needs to know she can rely on me as much as I need to know I can rely on her. She needs to grow with me as much as I need to grow with her. As entrepreneurs we need to deeply trust our own intuitive nudges and develop a relationship of trust within ourselves as well as our business as we proceed in our entrepreneurial journey.

Here's to Midnight Diamond "Tia"!

Live Into It!™ :)CC
www.LiveIntoIt.com

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